When we think about the way that girls are raised we are often reminded of the way moms and grandmas taught their little girls how to be proper and polite ladies. Even with the sexual revolution and the modern female independence, women can use a bit of re-calibration when it comes to teaching little girls about self-esteem. By the way this includes men involved in the lives of little girls as well.
“Do as I say not as I do” is one of the worst ways to go about teaching kids better ways to develop a healthy psychological well being. So one of the basic things that one can do to aid girls boost their self-esteem is to model it. We can not expect girls to be comfortable with themselves if they do not see their role models behaving in a manner that shows positive self-esteem. Girls need to see other positive female role models in their environment. This also goes for males in their life. If males reinforce stereotypes that encourage lack of respect towards females, then the result will be what we model, not what we preach. Children in general, will typically remember a very small fraction of what we say to them. However, kids pick up much more of what they see going on around them.
Look for the females that girls find “cool” and use them to emphasize the positive aspects they portray. For example, Beyonce Knowles or Jennifer Lopez are two celebrities that do much more than just rely on their careers in entertainment. Beyonce backs her sister, Tina Knowles, in her clothing business called the House of Dereon. Jennifer Lopez has her own line of clothing, fragrances, etc. Even if you don’t necessarily like everything about the role models that girls see regularly. It is better to work with their interest and point out the things you see that can enhance their own self-awareness.
In the school setting, you can have a group discussion about your own interests and goals. Whether that was a camping trip over the weekend or the master’s courses you take in the evening. The point is to let them see you as a person that goes beyond your job in the school and that you have goals and interests you like to pursue.
